Thursday, May 29, 2008

And so it continues...

Just when I thought we were making some headway on Grandpa's health, he broke his hip. Friday he was hanging a trellis on the front of his house when he fell. The MDs just thought it was badly bruised and sent him home with a walker. However, the pain only got worse so mom took him to the ER yesterday and they confirmed that his hip is indeed broken. He had surgery to replace the ball on the top of the femur this afternoon. So far, so good. He'll be in the hospital until Sunday and then he'll need physical therapy. After that, he will hopefully resume radiation and reschedule his colon resectioning. The eerie part in all of this is that Grandma was in the hospital this time last year deciding to stop treatment and go home with hospice. Grandpa was apparently admitted to the same floor- different room- and some of the RNs recognized my mom. I'm sure they will take extra good care of him. It's just strange to reflect back on the past year and be confronted with a grandparent's failing health all over again. Granted, Grandma's prognosis was grim from the start. Grandpa was told by his surgeon that he is healthier than most 55 year olds. They seem to have caught his cancer in time. Yada, yada, yada. It's just that this is how a lot of declines begin. I hate the thought of more hospitalizations in Grandpa's future. And I question how I would have the strength to lose another loved one right now. I know that I need to trust that all will work out. I have no reason to believe otherwise right now. This is just one of those times where working for hospice affects my judgement, attitude, and outlook. I've seen too much. Just today I was thinking that I should ammend my Living Will to reflect certain medications and treatments that I never want to have, based on what I've seen patients go through. I know. I'm morbid. Even though I'm questioning if I should stay in hospice, I would never trade my experience thus far. Stay tuned, my friends. Stay tuned.

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